I've had 2 hot chocolates since returning feeling spent and jaded from the London Book Fair.
Spending money to make money feels like it shouldn't apply to life generally, but it just sprang into my mind as I contemplated buying a Linkedin membership (more money disappearing nowhere). Large amounts of education are not enough, now I must buy into online job dating to get ahead - why is this??? Why isn't 1.5 (nearly there, just have to attempt not to fail my exams) degrees plus bloody tough to live through, also expensive, pressure and expectation heavy education enough???? Why is it that ALL I have to look forward to is UNPAID SLAVE LABOUR (Ok, so it's not exactly slave labour, I can after all leave, though to do what is unclear...) after all this effort AND actually accumulating quite a bit of varied work experience?
Young, pissed off and hanging from the very very end of my tether this evening.
This is not my life. Yet apparently it is...If anyone's planning a revolution please let me know - clearly my middle class, over-educated self will be first against the wall but I'm exhausted of the current system, and I've only been trapped in it for 3 years :(
No longer with access to bamboo forests I keep looking for ways forward... Naive, confused and desperate to tell others all about it!!!
Tuesday, 12 April 2011
Saturday, 2 April 2011
April happened a little unexpectedly this year, not sure where the end of March went, but it didn't take me with it.
Made a cake today. That was productive. I seem to remember from watching that film Sylvia (when avoiding an essay, much as I am doing right now) that Plath also baked to procrastinate. Possibly not a woman I want to emulate entirely (though, Ted Hughes, I certainly wouldn't say no). Also not I felt a very excellent film. Though I admit it's been years since I last saw it.
I did watch Agora recently for the first time. Mixed feelings. Visually effective, and gripping-ish, but ultimately something of a let down. Left me feeling outraged on a feminist front and upset by fundamentalism in all its forms, no doubt its intent.
Sigh. Back to Sri Lanka it is...wonder if working the cricket into my essay will be relevant/worthwhile?
Made a cake today. That was productive. I seem to remember from watching that film Sylvia (when avoiding an essay, much as I am doing right now) that Plath also baked to procrastinate. Possibly not a woman I want to emulate entirely (though, Ted Hughes, I certainly wouldn't say no). Also not I felt a very excellent film. Though I admit it's been years since I last saw it.
I did watch Agora recently for the first time. Mixed feelings. Visually effective, and gripping-ish, but ultimately something of a let down. Left me feeling outraged on a feminist front and upset by fundamentalism in all its forms, no doubt its intent.
Sigh. Back to Sri Lanka it is...wonder if working the cricket into my essay will be relevant/worthwhile?
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